Mr. Hooks

LOCATION:
Mr. Hook's, Madisonville, Ohio. Note: It's Not CAPTAIN Hook's, it's not Commadore Hook's, it's not even freaking Sargent Hook's or Private Hook's. It's just Mr. Hook's. Cause that's all the respect they need. PLUS they have flag rope up - in 'Merica! Red, White, and Blue. Who needs a fancy title when you've got flag rope pulling in customers for MILES?!


Captain Hook.



Commadore Hook (Two Feathers)


Mr. Hook (No Feathers, and still sticking it to Peter Pan)

GRADE: C
Mr. Hook's employs a single method of cooking. They don't grill, they don't broil, and they sure as hell don't bake anything. The kitchen didn't even have an oven. As a corporate policy, they aren't really concerned with their customer's "health" per se, and I'm gonna guess they're not exactly up on all the latest 'trans-fats' trends and hoopla. But they do know how to deep fry their food. All of it. I have a feeling, if you brought them a salad, they'd bring the Mr. Hook's pimp hand down HARD, snatch that salad up, and toss it in the deep fryer where it belongs, soaking up some real flavor.


Fried goodness. That's Chicken tenders, Perch, and fries. Don't ask me which is which.


The spread. The best things in this picture are the hush puppies and the fried okra. They were delicious.

QUESTIONABLE LEVEL: (6 out of 10)
When EVERYTHING is deep fried it has to be questionable. Also, a few of the menu items (Chicken Gizzards, Catfish Nuggets) aren't likely to be found in your more upscale fried food joints, something like a Long John Silvers for instance... Actually Long John's scares the crap out of me. They had a free 'Giant Shrimp' give-a-way day a few years ago - It was the most horrendous thing I've ever put in my mouth. I think it tried to eat my tongue.


Giant Squid eating this whale's tongue.

CONTACT NAME: ?
We didn't get her name, but she had just enough, "Whatever... you boys are crazy and my job is TOTALLY boring" in her to make for a decent hostess.


QUOTE: "Hey, does that truck belong to someone?" - Dry Cleaner Owner from nextdoor, stepping in the door and pointing at a truck in the parking lot.
"Yeah, that's mine." - Old dude sitting behind us.
"Okay." - Dry Cleaner guy, who then went back to his shop.
We figure he was just checking to make sure SOMEONE owned that truck, cause it was just too awesome to be an orphan.

NOTES/PHOTOS:


Note the not-so-value priced "value" meals. Each $8.99 and above.


Note: the ONLY decernable difference in these two meals is the extra 2-liter of Pepsi and $22. Awesome.


Steven carefully weighing the options.

On the way to Mr. Hooks, while turning around in a scenic area of Madisonville, We happend upon this house. Apparently this guy LOVES that tree. He's got a metal fence, a guard dog, and just for a little added tree security - a freaking BRICK WALL surrounding the thing. When you tap that tree, some untold awesomeness must squirt out.

12/6/06 The H&H Grill

LOCATION:
The H & H Grill, Norwood, Ohio.

GRADE: B-
Or maybe a solid C+. This place had all the trappings of your perfect greasy spoon dive. Locals at the counter. Regulars known by name coming in and out. Thin layer of smoke throughout. Nicest waitress in the entire world. And the food was a solid OK. I'm not going to schedule my next date night around the Double H dinner hours, if you catch my drift, but I'd go back for a rib sticking breakfast (with grits!!).

QUESTIONABLE LEVEL: 5 (of 10)
I didn't fear for my life (at least, not after I realized I had the nicest waitress in the world). But it would be a stretch to say this place wasn't sketchy (see photos below). That's why I choose to stradle the fence with a 5.

CONTACT NAME: Kelly
Did I mention this woman is the nicest waitress in the world? We should have gotten a photo with this human being. Luckily Steven let her know just how much we appreciated her kindness. If you go, make sure you ask for Kelly as your server (likely your only choice).

QUOTE: "Can I buy 4 cigarettes from you?" "Buy? Hell, you can have 'em."
(-generous patron guy)

NOTES/PHOTOS:






Three detours of note on this day:
1. We had to get cash for Kyle. SLOTM joints rarely accept plastic.
2. Steve just couldn't wait to see his new couch, just delivered, in action. Very nice indeed.
3. We tried the Happy Hollow first, but alas, they don't serve food. I did smell like the Happy Hollow though the rest of the day after just walking in to ask.



These 3 ladies were talking the entire time we ate. And, please notice the clock in the background. It had a "magic" floating pendulum, really, something you have to see to believe.



This is NOT a stock photo, and NO, we did NOT bring our own food stylist. This was Steve's Swiss Steak Special! It just came out looking that perfect. Amazing!



Don't even think about coming in and just using their tables to eat your own food! To be clear (and as pointed out by this very prominent sign), at this restaurant, they "serve food". (Maybe they should post that on the door).



I love these hand towel things! So clean and fresh! What? Not fresh you say? Simply pull to get fresh clean towel. Genius.

Ok, one more important SLOTM milestone. The particular Wednesday (Decemeber 6th, 2006 to be exact) was the very last day that smoking in restaurants and bars was legal in Ohio. We felt we needed to celebrate that.